Sunday, June 17, 2007
Tight jeans sugar...
Ok - so there are cool people everywhere. Why, hell, there are even cool people on the internet! I know it sounds a little crazy but if you are the Queen of Dysfunction, Captain Smack, Travis or the Boob Lady, you know exactly what I'm talking about. (yes - that was a compliment, guys. Your welcome.)
I actually know a lot of "cool" people in real life too. Like rock star cool. I'm not saying I'm cool by association or anything, but some people just have "it." Like Simon Cowell says... I wish some of their coolness rubbed off on me but to no avail I'm still watching from the side lines wishing I had enough courage to get a cool tattoo or piercing. (QofD - I had no idea you have your hooha pierced!!!! Can I see pictures sometime? Ok, ok... maybe she doesn't have her hooha pierced but wouldn't that be cool if she did?)
Anyway, let's steer away from the topic of QofD's hooha to someone else ching-a-ling-dong. That's right - I'm talking about the new breed of indie rockers with their retro 1980's tight ass jeans. Or should I say, tight packaged jeans...
For some reason all these boys are wearing extremely tight, black, tapered leg jeans. Sure they look kinda cute after a couple of shots and some sweet talking, but what I think about more often is along the lines of... let's just say his baby making machine. A couple of months ago my friend was talking to her Mom about how in the eighties, the guys and girls would where such tight jeans that there would be consequences. When a Mom says the word, "consequences" everyone sits up and listens. Obviously the girls would get UTI's and bladder infections but the boys??? They had it much worse. Their baby machines would stop working!!!!! Those are the pants that makes the babies go away!!!!
Now- keep in mind that I have done tons (meaning zero) research on this and have come to the conclusion that if you need to be "cool" and you happen to be a boy, that maybe, just maybe you shouldn't wear really tight jeans. Because you know... How would you feel when you are shooting blanks and it was all because you wanted to look cool??? Just get a tattoo bitch!!!!!